Thursday, September 28, 2017

The Day The Season Died


Resident poet NoCramps has done it again. Enjoy and feel free to use the above video to sing along.

A short, short, year ago
I can still remember how those Blue Jays used to make us smile.
And I knew if Pearce had a chance, that they could make us Jithers dance.
And maybe we'd be Happy for a while.
But April came and made us quiver. At 1 and 9, could they deliver?
Bad knees needing more prep, Trav couldn't take one more step.
I don't know if I cried or laughed when I read about poor Dosh's calf.
But something knocked us right down half.
The day the season died.

[Chorus]
So sigh, sigh, Jith I just want to die.
Take the Go Train to the Skydome, and just sit there and cry.
Gibby's old boys are drinking whisky and rye,
Singin' this'll be the Jay's that won't fly. This'll be the Jays that won't fly.

[Verse 1]
Have you seen the disabled list?
Hands, shoulders, elbows, Anthony's wrist.
Middle fingers torn by seams.
Now did we believe we could go unscathed?
Can we be autumn champagne bathed?
And can we reach somehow our playoff dreams?

Well, I know that we're in love with Bats, 'Cause I saw us tippin' all our hats.
But he started slow this year. Man, it was a great career.

With Alternate Tab and  Bronchial Buck,
Sayin' "Tell ya what we've had bad luck".
But we're out sitting in the truck.
The day the season died.

[Chorus]
My heart is stinging
Sigh, sigh, Jith I just want to die.
Take the Go train to the Skydome and just sit there and cry.
Gibby's old boys are drinking whiskey and rye,
Singin' this'll be The Jays that don't fly. This'll be The Jays that don't fly.

Now for 2 years Jays had owned the town.
Rogers got fat chasing baseball's crown.
But that's not how it used to be.
When the Ninja brang us Bringer Of Rain, Tulo, Astro and also Coltrane,
There were cheers that came from you and me.

Oh, but while the Ninja shopped around
The Shapster showered shade and frowned
The boardroom's ears were burned. No Ninja was returned.

And while Salty left, but not his Marcs, Unicorns flew in graceful arcs.
And we fed catchers to the sharks.
The day the season died.

[Chorus]
Hopes were swinging.
Sigh, sigh Jith I just want to die.
Take the Go train to the Skydome and just sit there and cry.
Gibby's old boys are drinking whiskey and rye,
Singin' This'll be The Jays that don't fly. This'll be The Jays that don't fly.

[Verse 3]
Near even Steven, we were believin'
The birds could do better than break even.
Eight games back and still in last.
Two fowls tied for the last spot.
The players tried but it was for naught
With the O's deciding to give last a swat.

Now the All-Star game was sweet embrace
While Smoak Show had Just won First Base.
We all got up to cheer, Oh' but no one would hold our beer!

When the players tried to take the turf,
Through waves of pain they tried to surf.
 A hot spot tried to burn our Smurf.
The day the season died

[Chorus]
Our hands were wringing.
Sigh, sigh, Jith I just want to die.
Take the Go train to the Skydome and just sit there and cry.
Gibby's old boys are drinking whiskey and rye,
Singin' This'll be The Jays that don't fly. This'll be the jays that don't fly.

[Verse 4]
Oh and there they were, a home and home.
2 at SunTrust , first 2 the Dome.
With a winning streak to extend.
So come on, Joe B., get up,  swap bottles
Time for you to go full throttle
'Cause starters that can fire are our friend
Oh, and as the players focus strayed,
Slurries of words rained on parades.
No 2 games off the field could mask what was revealed.
And as the balls climbed high into the night,
Stro's battery the brightest light,
Darrell's shoulder could not #stayinthefight
The day the season died

[Chorus]
We were clinging.
Sigh, sigh, Jith I just want to die.
Take the Go train to the Skydome and just sit there and cry.
Gibby's old boys are drinking whiskey and rye,
Singin' This'll be The Jays that don't fly. This'll be the Jays that don't fly.

[Outro]
Wince met the gal who sprang the blogs
And treated her to ballpark dogs
But she just smiled and turned away
I've been down to the JaysShop store
Where I'd seen the jersey's hang before
But the man there said those jerseys couldn't play.

And on the paths Jay Juniors rushed
Old Lady flushed and Hazel was crushed
It's hard to let it soak in. The playoff streak is broken.

And the three men now who bear the cross,
The Mark, The Tony and The Ross,
They'll watch their Clevelands be the Boss.
The day the season died

[Chorus]
Well maybe next spring.
Sigh. sigh, Jith I just want to die.
Take the Go train to the Skydome and just sit there and cry.
Gibby's old boys are drinking whiskey
Singin' This'll be the Jays that don't fly.
This'll be the Jays that don't fly.